If one asks how someone is doing, one should get comfy. PERHAPS after checking one's bladder. 😉
I used to get mind - numbingly LONG text messages from my stepsister. I still have the cellphone that they're on, even though it's outmoded. ( sentimentality..... )I haven't heard from her in about 6 years. I WOULD *LOVE* TO GET A MINDNUMBINGLY LONG TEXT MESSAGE FROM HER.
Oh Daniel, I can hear how much you miss that connection. I can't remember where I heard this, but I'd call that ambiguous grief. When it's still possible to connect, but for whatever reason, that person is unavailable to you. I'm going through that right now with a 20-year friendship that ended in September. Sending you love today.
I really enjoyed this, Emily. I'm glad to know that the best response to learning someone has lost a child is just--truth. And I'm glad to have been given a deeper sense into the calculation you have to do when people ask about your family. Sounds like this guy would make a great friend.
If one asks how someone is doing, one should get comfy. PERHAPS after checking one's bladder. 😉
I used to get mind - numbingly LONG text messages from my stepsister. I still have the cellphone that they're on, even though it's outmoded. ( sentimentality..... )I haven't heard from her in about 6 years. I WOULD *LOVE* TO GET A MINDNUMBINGLY LONG TEXT MESSAGE FROM HER.
Oh Daniel, I can hear how much you miss that connection. I can't remember where I heard this, but I'd call that ambiguous grief. When it's still possible to connect, but for whatever reason, that person is unavailable to you. I'm going through that right now with a 20-year friendship that ended in September. Sending you love today.
My stepsis is just such a GREAT person, & ever since I moved in '08, she was a lifeline for me. Thank you !
I have a cousin in the " new " locale, but she is very unempathetic & distant even when we're in the same room.
I really enjoyed this, Emily. I'm glad to know that the best response to learning someone has lost a child is just--truth. And I'm glad to have been given a deeper sense into the calculation you have to do when people ask about your family. Sounds like this guy would make a great friend.
Thank you, Isabel! It's a balancing act for sure. My story makes people uncomfortable, and I understand that...the only real wrong answer is silence.
Great essay. It is incredible how grief and joy, struggle and beauty can live within and around us, simultaneously.
Absolutely!!