Play Your Heart Out
Thirteen girls, thirteen puddles of tears, and one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen.
Hello Friends,
Last weekend we unpacked and re-packed our suitcases. We stuffed our car to the gills with uniforms, softball bats, and catcher’s gear. Then we slowly made our way south, through L.A. traffic and past the Nuclear Boobies. We ducked under landing planes at San Diego’s downtown airport and stopped at an adorable motel in Chula Vista, CA.
We were there for my daughter’s final tournament of her all-star softball season.
Before the third game, the win-or-go-home game, she told me she might prefer to sit the bench. She said, barely audible and through uncomfortable tears, “If I don’t play, I can’t make a mistake.” It was the most honest thing I’ve heard her say. “But if you sit out, you will miss the fun of playing a sport you love.” She agreed but didn’t quite believe it was a fair trade.
Until she caught that first pitch.
From the dugout to the outfield, these girls locked in. They were making plays they would normally miss. They were a different team, and I have the strained vocal cords to prove it.
To play your heart out is, by its very nature, dangerous. You are screaming to the world, “I want this!” But, when a series of small mistakes add up to a loss, your heart is out there flapping in the wind, exposed to the elements, and you might wonder if it might have been safer to stay home.
But she was not alone. Twelve other girls, girls she calls friends, wanted it just as bad as she did, and I think they provided shelter for one another.
I saw these girls gush with vulnerability. They cried while they laughed and laughed while they cried. They didn’t want to leave the field. They didn’t want to leave each other. I think they recognized how rare and wonderful a moment like this is. I know I did.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error.
- Theodore Roosevelt
As a kid, I didn’t play team sports. I say it was because I was too shy, but really, I was too scared. Too afraid to play my heart out and fall short.
Somewhere along the line, I became the kind of person who wears her heart on her sleeve, who says yes to love even when loss is guaranteed. I am a person who climbs into the arena even when terrified.
Here I am with my big tattered heart flapping in the wind saying to the world, “Give me all of it.”
This is where I am today. Thank you for listening.
xoxo,
Emily
Your Journal Prompt for Today
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Links to Ponder
To be the cool mom if only for a moment. (River teeth)
For all you font nerds (The Washington Post)
It’s Tomato season! (Cup of Jo)
How can you fit a beginning, middle, and end on a napkin? (Esquire)
Summer of minimal effort Yes, please. (In Pursuit of Clean Countertops)
A tender look at what happens when we try to understand the people we’ve lost. (Houston landing)
The aftermath can be beautiful (Sarah Blessy)
If the beauty and dies industry is built on making us feel bad about our bodies, then the remodeling industry is built on making us feel bad about our homes… This take has me thinking hard about the decisions we are making with our remodel and choosing things we like because we like them and not because of the effect on resale value. (Culture study)
Like what you like (Modern Mrs. Darcy)
If you only have time for one thing… Check out these pictures. My “Pure Michigan” cousins will love this! (Thrillist)
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